Values and Beliefs: A Theory of Processing Values

Because life is different through time and space, we cannot be certain what experiences any one person will have.  We therefore cannot be certain what values, what style of life, would be most suitable for any person.

We do, however, have some ideas about what processes might be most effective for obtaining values.  These ideas grow from the assumption that whatever values one obtains should work as effectively as possible to relate one to his/her world in a satisfying and intelligent way.

From this assumption comes the process of valuing.  A look at this process may make clear how we define a value.

Unless something satisfies all seven of the criteria noted below, we do not call it a value.  In other words, for a value to result, all of the following seven requirements must apply.  Collectively, they describe the process of valuing.

1. Choosing freely.  If something is in fact to guide one's life whether or not the authority is watching, it must be a result of free choice.  If there is coercion; the result is not likely to stay with one for long, especially when out of the range of the source of that coercion.  Values must be freely selected if they are to be really valued by the individual.
2. Choosing from among alternatives.  This definition of values is concerned with things that are chosen by the individual and, obviously, there can be no choice if there are no alternatives from which to choose.  It makes no sense, for example, to say that one values eating.  One really has no choice in the matter.  What one may value is certain types of food or certain forms of eating, but not eating itself.  We must all obtain nourishment to exist; there is no room for decision.  Only when a choice is possible, when there is more than one alternative from which to choose, do we say a value can result.
3. Choosing after thoughtful consideration of the consequences of each alternative.  Impulsive or thoughtless choices do not lead to values as we define them.  For something intelligently and meaningfully to guide one's life, it must emerge from a weighing and understanding.  Only when the consequences of each of the alternatives are clearly understood can one make intelligent choices.  There is an important cognitive factor here.  A value can emerge only with thoughtful consideration of the range of the alternatives and the consequences of each choice.
4. Prizing and Cherishing.  When we value something, it has a positive tone.  We prize it, cherish it, esteem it, respect it, and hold it dear.  We are happy with our value.  A choice, even when we have made it freely and thoughtfully, may be a choice we are not happy to make.  We may choose to fight in a war, but be sorry circumstances make that choice reasonable.  In our definition, values flow from choices that we are glad to make.  We prize and cherish the guides to life that we call values.
5. Affirming.  When we have chosen something freely, after consideration of the alternatives, and when we are proud of our choice, glad to be associated with it, we are likely to affirm that choice when asked about it.  We are willing to publicly affirm our values.  We may even be willing to champion them.  If we were ashamed of a choice, if we would not make our position known when appropriately asked, we would not be dealing with values but something else.
6. Acting Upon Choices.  When we have a value, it shows up in aspects of our living.  We may do some reading about things we value.  We are likely to form friendships or to be in organisations in ways that nourish our values.  We may spend money on a choice we value.  We budget time or energy for our values.  In short, for a value to be present, life itself must be affected.  Nothing can be a value that does not, in fact, give direction to actual living.  The person who talks about something but never does anything about it is dealing with something other than a value.

7. Repeating.  Where something reaches the stages of a value, it is very likely to reappear on a number of occasions in the life of the person who holds it.  It shows up in several different situations, at several different times.  We would not think of something that appears once in a lifetime and never again as a value.  Values tend to have a persistence, tend to make a pattern in a life.

To review this definition, we see values as based on three processes: choosing, prizing, and acting.

CHOOSING:     (1) Freely.

                       (2) From alternatives.

                       (3) After thoughtful consideration of the consequences of each alternative.

PRIZING:        (4) Cherishing, being happy with the choice.

                       (5) Willing to affirm the choice publicly.

ACTING:          (6) Doing something with the choice.

                       (7) Repeatedly, in some pattern of life.

These processes collectively define valuing.  Results of the valuing process are called values.

The reader might pause for a moment and apply the seven criteria for a value to one of his/her hobbies, be it sewing, skiing or hi-fi.  Is it prized, freely and thoughtfully chosen from alternatives, acted upon, repeated, and publicly known?  If so, one might say that you value the hobby.

VALUES CONFLICT

These are the kinds of problems that occur when we don't like what someone else is doing, but their behaviour in no way directly affects us.  Of course, others may dislike some of our behaviours as well.  We call these problems Values Conflict.

Other people put pressure on us to conform and we resent their interference, but we are guilty of doing the same to others.  There are advantages to conformity.  People know what to expect, but it also means that we are inhibited from expressing our true selves.

Often we are concerned about other people's behaviour because we feel what they are doing will be harmful to them.  We may realise that it is their problem, but we hate to see them go through needless pain.  In fact we can and do have an effect on the behaviour of others.

Ways in which we influence others:

Modelling: If we would like others to behave in a certain way, then we need to be sure we act that way ourselves.  If you value honesty, don't ask someone to tell a telephone caller you're not there when you are in the same room.

Consultant:  Sometimes in a values conflict situation you feel that the other person is doing what s/he is doing out of ignorance of the consequences of the situation.  You may feel that by presenting the facts s/he can see the harmful effects.  This is a job for a consultant.

A consultant advises a company on some problem.  First, however, a consultant must be hired.  You are "hired" if the other person allows you to act as a consultant, otherwise, your information is considered interference and will be resented.

Next the consultant gathers together all the facts that are available and presents the case to the client.  It is important that you have done your homework and have your facts straight.

The consultant having completed the job does not then come back to the company and ask why the company has not followed his recommendations.  The company would fire him or her.  The same thing happens when we keep after people for not following your advice.  This is called nagging.  The other person in effect "fires' you as a person having any influence over his/her life.

Changing Our Own Values: When we are thinking of values, it is important to realise that the values of society are continually changing and we need to ask ourselves if we have the ultimate, perfect set of values.  Perhaps we need to examine our values and also look at the values of others.  We need to listen to other's point of view to find out what their values are.  Here is an opportunity to use our skills of active listening.  Perhaps the other person has something that we find interesting and valuable.